HIDE AND SEEK
by esn1966
Summary: Lucifer agrees to babysit. What could go wrong?


Lucifer was in Hell. Well, not literally but what else would you call it when the former Lord of Hell was standing in a closet hiding from the small human.

It started out so innocently. Chloe had asked him to watch the Spawn while she ran to the precinct to sign some papers related to her case that was going to trial on Monday. She said she wouldn't be long and so he thought that it wouldn't be a problem. Just put in one of those nauseatingly sweet Disney movies and the child would be enraptured for hours. Easy peasy.

Everything was going according to plan until the child started in on her questions about Heaven and Hell. What were Hell and Heaven like? Who was there? Could he take her to visit? Other questions in a similar vein. He never lied and Chloe had not forbidden him from telling her child anything, so he answered her questions truthfully. Was it his fault that Chloe's name (or the _Detective_) entered the answers often?

Apparently, it happened enough that she made a bet that he couldn't go 5 minutes without mentioning her mother. If he won, she would watch the remainder of the movie in total silence and if he lost, he had to play a game of her choosing. He took the bet. He was the freaking King of the Underworld; he could certainly go that long without talking about a human. Geez.

He was wrong.

He was telling her a story. Since she had asked about Heaven, his topic was sure to be boring and as far away from the Detective as he could get.

"_Did you know I have a twin brother?"_

"_Really"_

"_Yes. Michael. Bloody twit. Sword stuck so far up his…well, never mind. A bigger Daddy's boy you will never find. No fun at all. Even when we were younger, he never wanted to join in any of my pranks. I bet he's still up there telling anyone who will listen that he is 'defending' the Silver City against Evil me."_

"_Does he look like you?"_

"_Of course. We were created at the exact same moment. I have always asserted that I am far more handsome but if we were side by side, I don't think even your mother could tell us apart."_

She just smiled at him then. He didn't understand until he thought back on what he just said.

Bloody Hell!

A bet was just as good as a wager in his opinion, so he knew he had to abide by her conditions. His word was his bond after all. He told her to go pick out whichever board game she desired to play so they could get on with it but she had another game in mind.

Hide and Seek.

So, that was how the former Lord of Hell found himself in the closet of the master bedroom. Where else was a 6'3" Devil supposed to hide in this small apartment?

"_Where is that child?"_ Lucifer thought to himself for the millionth time. Oh, she was spending too much time with Maze for surely, she was just torturing him now. It had been long enough that he even considered leaving his hiding place, but a deal was a deal and the Devil never reneged on a deal.

Suddenly he heard a noise. Footsteps on the stairs heading in his direction. The steps entered the bedroom and Lucifer gathered himself to give the little urchin the scare of her life. However, when the door opened, the eyes he beheld were not the deep brown eyes of the child but the cobalt blue of her mother's.

"Luci…"

He grabbed her and dragged her into the closet before she could finish his name, put his hand over her mouth to keep her quite and shut the door. After listening to see if Trixie had followed her mother, he looked back at Chloe. She glared at him, letting him know that she was none too happy with being man-handled in her own house.

"Lucifer, what are you doing?" She hissed in a low, hushed tone when he removed his hand from her mouth.

"Hiding of course." What else did she think he was doing?

"Why"

"Because I lost a bet with your offspring." He stated as a matter of fact, still using the hushed tones. Wouldn't do to give himself away at this stage of the game.

Chloe wasn't sure she had the heart to tell him that Trixie was currently in the living room drawing and knew perfectly well where Lucifer was hiding. She didn't think he would take it well, being teased by a 10-year old. She could tell he was slightly put out but had to admit the close quarters were quite cozy.

Lucifer seemed to become aware of just how close he and Chloe were when she began running her hands up and down the lapels of his jacket.

"This reminds me of the games we used to play growing up." Her voice had taken on a decidedly more seductive tone.

"Really?" He had to admit that the hiding spot had its advantages now that he wasn't alone.

"Yes. Spin the bottle (_Was it empty?_), Truth or Dare (_Always the truth, darling_), Seven minutes in Heaven," with each game she mentioned her hands moved from his shoulders to his chest to his waist. When she got to the last one, her breathing was unsteady and his wasn't much better. There was also a decided bulge pressing into her stomach.

"Seven minutes where? What does that even mean?" Lucifer's incredulous tone spoke volumes. They both were speaking in low voices, but Lucifer had long forgotten about being 'found' by Trixie. He was too focused on Chloe's lips and hands to care.

"Well," she continued, "that's when you and another person get shut in a closet to do whatever you want for seven minutes." She continued to run her hands over his torso until she had her arms wrapped around him.

"Seven minutes!" Lucifer's shocked voice was decidedly not quite. "Are you telling me that pubescent boys and girls are given to believe that it should only take seven minutes to reach orgasm? No wonder you humans are so repressed and unsatisfied."

Chloe laughed at his outrage. "No, Lucifer. It's just to make out. You know, touching and kissing each other like this." Her hands had migrated to his neck and she drew his head down to capture his lips with her own.

He fully reciprocated her kiss and deepened it into something more than just a chase make-out kiss. They finally broke apart when breathing became a priority and Lucifer leaned his forehead against hers while they caught their breath.

"Though it pales in comparison now, when you are 13 and kissing Patrick McGraw for the first time, it felt like Heaven." Chloe's statement came out breathless.

Before Lucifer could comment the door to the closet was yanked open and Trixie yelled "Aha!"

Both adults jumped, startled by the sudden intrusion and Chloe was very aware that she need to stay in front of Lucifer before her daughter got an eyeful.

"Aw, Mommy. You found Lucifer before I did." Trixie said trying to sound disappointed but failing miserably.

"Um… yes. Yes, I did. Um… hey, Monkey, are you hungry?" Chloe was less than eloquent as she turned around but she was in damage control mode. She was sure her hair was a mess and her face flushed but she hoped it would escape Trixie's notice. She knew it was hopeless. Her daughter was too observant for her own good.

"Is Lucifer staying for dinner?" The tone of her voice showed how much she REALLY wanted him to stay, all feigned disappointment disappearing in a flash.

"Mm-hmm." This from Chloe nodding her head.

"Yes, Child," from Lucifer sounding like he didn't have a care in the world.

"Come on. Let's go start dinner. Lucifer will be down in a minute." Chloe left the closet taking Trixie's hand and leading her out of the room. She threw Lucifer a look over shoulder that said _Sorry_.

Lucifer took a few deep breaths trying to slow his rapidly beating heart and controlling other parts of his anatomy before leaving the closet. Bloody Hell, what a day.

Lucifer was in Hell but if it also included his two favorite women, then he would gladly stay.


End file.
